croque monsieur tartlets

i didn’t take pictures in time to capture the full dozen little croque monsieur-inspired tartlets i made for dinner today, but here. look at the two that are left.


i was with my kids in sainsburys today and saw that they now stock quorn’s vegan ham slices. so naturally, i bought all five packets that were left, so they’d stock more in response to increased demand.

eldest wanted ham sandwiches for dinner. i said no, as i’d already planned a sort of cajun dirty rice thing, but then thought of croque monsieurs and said yes. then we passed a roll of puff pastry in the fridge…

so i decided to do a big croque monsieur-style tart. but when we got home, the puff pastry roll didn’t quiiite fit my largest baking tray. then i noticed my sad, neglected muffin tin…

anyways, read on!

croque monsieur tartlets
1 roll puff pastry, cut into 12 squares
dijon mustard
6 slices vegan ham, diced
1 to 2 tomatoes, diced
grated vegan cheese
1/2 an onion, chopped
around 1 cup bechamel sauce

okay so first off: caramelise the onions in the margarine when you’re making your bechamel sauce. you really need some caramelised onions in this dish.

either line a muffin tin with 12 cupcake cases, or grease with margarine or something. shove the puff pastry dough squares into each hole, then bake at 180C while you chop all the things. check the pastry every 5 minutes and if the middle is puffing up poke them with a fork.

when the middle’s looking a bit less soggy but not fully cooked, take the tray out of the oven, smear the bottom of each tartlet with a little dijon mustard, and fill with about 1 Tbsp each of diced ham, tomatoes, and cheese. put back in the oven and bake until the pastry’s golden.

finally, take out of the oven and spoon a thick layer of bechamel sauce over the top of each tartlet. put under a medium-hot grill until bubbly. great for picnics!

fad food: hot dogs


i blame waitrose.

there’s a waitrose near the aldi i always shop at, and one day, in a quest for vegan quorn (which ended up not being that amazing anyway, any suggestions for using up the second bag in my freezer would be helpful), i stopped in.

normally i don’t shop at posh bullshit places like waitrose, but as it turns out they’re really really good for finding specialty vegan products! i suppose that’s one benefit to associating the word ‘vegan’ with ‘posh’.

anyways in addition to the quorn i found flavoured tofu (not necessarily big enough packets to justify the price though), swedish glace chocolate covered ice cream lollies, salted caramel coyo coconut yogurt that seriously TASTED LIKE CHEESECAKE Y’ALL, and a packet of vegan franks.

oh, no. the obvious next purchase was finger rolls. no, no, no.

eldest son LOVES hot dogs. we blasted through that packet of franks and due to cheapness and laziness reverted back to linda mccartney sausages. dm;hhd.

after a couple dogs with just ketchup and squeezy american-style mustard, i rediscovered the homemade cucumber pickles in the fridge. a couple days later came the dessicated fried onion in the cupboard. husband couldn’t find finger rolls yesterday so bought white hamburger-style rolls instead. DON’T CARE HOT DOGS.

i’m now at the point where i’m talking myself down from a hot dog for breakfast, like a wino reasoning with herself that so long as the pinot doesn’t come out until the afternoon it’s socially acceptable to day drink by yourself.

…hot dogs are allowed to come out after 10am.

giving myself a week before i attempt a detox.